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Previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
Holy shit, you guys.
Yeah, that about sums it up.
You see landing atop those towers one of each of the different five coloured chromatic dragons.
Above the orders you hear screams forming.
You see the dragons begin to stop circling and they begin to soar down to the volcano floor.
Can we sneak by these dragons somehow that are busy eating these people?
Sorry people.
At that moment you hear the same crushing crack.
This is a fucking ice giant's castle.
A flying ice fortress.
You see three red robed wizards standing at the gate to the temple of Tiamat.
He runs through the doors as they slam shut and the dragons in the air
and off in the distance they roar incredibly loud.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.
We're a D&D 5th edition actual play podcast and I'm your dungeon master Russ More and
with me today is Tom Laird.
Hey, that's me.
Unexpected first out of the gate and I play FlintFirebeard.
And Carla Johnson.
Hey, it's me the in-betweeny weenie like most of the time.
And I play Nulara Moonbrook.
And Amy More.
Well, I don't have a funny like rhyme to go with mine.
But like third is the one with the hairy chest.
Doesn't really seem to fit in this instance.
Or does it?
And I play Thea Mastasia.
Uncertain on that one.
Where there is certainty in the world is over on Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
And you can be certain that you get an extra bonus episode every month.
You can be certain that you get to hang out with us every month with our goo kang.
And you can also be certain about some other things that are really great like.
You're certain that all the people there are really nice.
This is true.
And certain that there are lots of other
amazing things that come along with being part of the Dumbs and Dragons Patreon community.
And certain that you get an episode dedicated to you.
Like today's episode, which is dedicated to Nicholas Bark.
Hey, thanks, Nicholas.
Thank you, Nicholas.
Thank you, Nicholas.
Thank you, Nicholas.
Thank you for being here.
I wonder if he prefers a Nick.
I don't know.
He registered as Nicholas.
So he probably prefers Nicholas then.
Probably prefers Nicholas.
That's what we're going to go with.
If you want to be like Nicholas.
And if you prefer to be called a different name than Nicholas.
Maybe tell us which name you prefer to be called.
And you can sign up at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cat.
Fuck it.
Let's play some D&D.
It's been a weird night.
Oh, I changed it.
You did.
It's a weird night, folks.
Get ready for it.
Friends.
You are standing at the gate to the temple of Tiamat.
You've just seen three red wizards run in and shut the door behind them with a loud
was probably what I did in post there.
Yeah, yeah, that sounds like me.
It sounds like something I would do.
Echoed through as there are dragons roaring above your head.
You hear them fighting off in the distance.
What do you do?
Guys, we have to get through this door.
Agreed.
I assume we're all at the door at this point.
Like we've run forward.
I assume nothing.
Because if I put you there, then you could be in danger.
Oh, I totally.
I totally ran there.
Yeah.
Like once Thea did the old blasty blast and Flint booked it, I think.
I assume we all would have been taken off.
We're doing it.
Yeah.
So we all like ran because in theory, we wanted to, you know,
maybe stop them from closing that door.
No such luck.
Is it maybe a situation where they're like panicked and trying to lock it
and they just can't seem to get it locked?
Like when the serial killers after them in a movie
and then we just like kick on through the door.
Or related question.
Is there a small, I don't know, like doggie door, like a drake door,
a little drake door.
And, you know, because I'm imagining they were very,
like it was huge, like castle-y doors, right?
Not a human sized door.
Definitely.
Yeah, it is a large, large door.
Judging by the sound that I found to use on the last episode.
Yeah, it really was.
Loved it.
So good.
Stone, right?
Stone doors?
Yeah, well, stone and bone and something else that rhymes with bone.
Old iPhone.
But no, you don't hear them fumbling with any locks on the other side
and there appear to be no drake doors.
Dang.
Are there handles or anything?
Is it a smooth fucking?
Good question.
Good question.
It's a smooth fucking.
What is like a good smooth fucking?
I mean, it's not smooth.
It's jagged, as is the rest of the temple.
But in saying that, you don't appear to see any handles of sorts.
So it's made, obviously, of the same amalgam of materials
as the rest of the temple.
You got it.
Okay, cool.
Does anyone have the ability to walk through walls?
You guys just maybe hadn't mentioned it yet.
Let me just look at my character sheet real quick here.
I mean, are there any nooks and or crannies?
First level dwarf skill.
I mean, it was Nulara asking, not Carla.
Oh, my apologies.
Yeah, I've known that since day one.
It's the weirdest never come up.
Because if there are nooks or crannies,
could become an ant or something
that could squeeze through a nook and or cranny.
Okay.
And open it from the other side
because it seems to be a push, not a pull situation.
I mean, we might want to hop on that giant owl
and just fly up to that window we saw earlier, too.
Are there any windows on this side?
More conveniently located?
Yeah, there are slits running up
that would fit a human sized individual.
Oh, let's go.
Gwak you into it.
She's all like.
It's her owl battle cry.
Beautiful.
It was really good.
Inspiring.
Okay, we all hop on her.
You all fly up to one of these slits in the tower.
From the angle that you can see in,
you don't see into any sort of opening.
You see a wall directly in front of you.
And without looking any further,
you see a spiraling chromatic color from above and below,
moving up and down at the same time.
Kind of like a tube of energy, if you will, in the middle of this.
Yeah.
Kind of got like an Aya Sauron situation going on here.
Perhaps, perhaps.
Does it look like there's a floor or anything at a higher level,
like near this window?
Like we're not just going to jump through this slit
and then like drop straight to the floor and die?
Somebody can peek their head through.
I'm in.
You look through.
There appears to be a platform above you
and then equidistant to what you climbed.
Down to the floor below you.
So probably about 100 feet down.
One other thing you see down at the bottom,
you see a red-robed wizard and he is casting something.
Okay.
Does the slit go like all the way up past that floor
or is the slit only like open to this level?
Appears to be only open 20 or 30 feet
carving into the side of this tower.
How far away?
That we're about 100 feet.
Okay, I'm going to Eldritch Blast the bitch.
Okay, there we go.
To 26.
Sure, yeah.
Nice.
I'm three blasts on this dude.
I have to do one for each.
That one's not going to hit.
That one's only a 12.
But that was also a 26.
Guys, I'm rolling 17s like they're candy.
I love it.
That's not a thing.
It is now though.
It is now.
You feel the energy move up your arm and halt.
As it reaches your fingertips.
What, what, what?
To what, what, what?
I would like to perceive.
I rolled a three plus nine.
That's a 12.
From above, you hear the rumble of flame coming down towards you
and you must make a dexterity saving throw.
Guys, my magic not working.
That's a 14.
You pull your head back and get out of the way just in time.
As flames erupt out of the slit that you were in.
As this fireball hits and explodes outward.
Okay, well that was hot.
That was hot.
You guys, my magic didn't work.
I don't know what's going on.
Guys, this does not bode well for us.
That was a very strong spell I just tried to cast
and it was just kind of like smooshed aside.
Um, I mean, really the whole idea of Tiamat hasn't
bowed well for us since day one.
So it's not going to stop us now.
This is true.
Do we want to fly down to the ground
and like get out of this visible area
or do we want to fly around
and see if there's another way in?
Because it seems like we have to get inside to try and like
we have to get inside, right?
Yeah, we got to disrupt whatever's going on in there.
Yeah, let's see if there's another way in.
So we fly with guacamole.
You begin flying around
and you see down amidst the rubble.
Everybody make a perception check.
I don't want to.
My dice suck.
15.
15 is pretty good.
No, it was a six and I have a nine bonus.
Oh, that's not so great then.
No.
Uh, 26.
Oh, I'm not even going to say mine.
Mine's embarrassing.
I don't see anything.
You guys fly around.
You're looking for another way in.
You see the chaos of the frost giants
fighting off the chromatic dragons
with different armored weapons
and throwing axes and spears
as they are battling them in the caldera of the volcano.
You fly out back towards the direction you came
and you see, Nularaaaa,
you see down amidst the rubble a person.
Looks like they are trying to hide,
moving from bone to stolder, bone to stolder.
Stone to boulder?
Stone to boulder.
Stone to boulder to bone.
Whatever.
You see them hiding and moving.
Bull stoners.
Rook to bishop seven?
Yeah.
A human, like one of the sacrifices?
Yeah, that's what you could assume.
Guys, I see a person down there,
like one of the sacrifices.
They can't complete the ritual
without the last person, right?
What do we do?
Do we go help them?
Do we find out how they came out of the thing?
Like, should we go to that person?
I mean, they might have a way in for us.
Guacamole can't take another person,
but we can get down there to them.
Yeah, I see you do it.
You fly down and the person looks as you
soar above them and sees you
and kind of cowers behind one of the boulders.
It's okay, we're good guys?
We're not looking to, you know, ritually sacrifice you.
We're trying to stop this whole campaign.
We're trying to get in there
and take it down from the inside.
Any ideas on a way we can get in there?
Do you want to get in there?
That seems dangerous.
Yeah, I mean, there's the way
they brought us in there.
And how was that?
It was through some of the tunnels.
I was trying to make my way
over to a tunnel that we've been led to before
on the other side of the caldera here.
What's your name?
Merv.
Is that short for a Mervin?
Murphy?
No, it's just Merv.
Oh, Merv.
Yeah.
Merv the Perv.
All right.
I mean, poor Merv.
That seems inappropriate.
He's having a pretty rough day.
Do you want me to help you?
Yeah, no, sorry.
I didn't have another rhyme, I'm sorry.
Merv the Perv, short for perfect.
Perfect.
You're a gem.
Why don't we go together?
You can get into the tunnel and get out
and we can get into the tunnel and get in.
Okay, yeah, sure.
Yeah, let's do that.
Assuming you were following behind him,
he begins leading the way to a tunnel on the far side
of the caldera.
And you enter and he says,
sometimes they keep guards here.
I don't know.
It seems kind of busy.
They might be somewhere else,
but I can kind of lead the way here
if you maybe take the lead.
Yeah, you let me know what way to go, Merv.
I've got you.
You begin walking down the paths.
You come to a T-intersection.
He's like, take a right here.
You don't hear anything as you walk up to it
and you keep walking.
Merv, are you the only survivor?
I think so.
Everybody else kind of got eaten.
I managed to hide as the dragons were swooping down
and then some others, I don't know if you saw,
but they got blasted by the wizards
as they were running away.
And I just kind of waited.
It seemed like those giants were taking care
of a lot of the business over there.
Okay.
Terrible business.
Do you know if all of you need to be sacrificed?
I don't know.
They just brought us out there.
What do you do, Merv?
What's your job?
I did run a fishing boat, fishing ship.
Awesome.
Yeah, I know.
Sounds super important.
You're running of the fishing boat.
You know what?
Soon, before you know what you're going to be.
Fishing that sea again.
Well, I hope so.
I mean, they did kind of destroy my village.
Hopefully they'll rebuild if anybody survived.
Okay, I'm trying to stay positive for you here, Merv.
Trying to stay positive.
You continue walking down a ways
and he's giving you directions
and he leads you through a long tunnel
where there's no turns to get out of it.
You eventually make it back to a familiar location
where you initially came in and walked down
and found the prisoners' chambers.
So this is the way they took you to get into the tower?
Well, they've taken us down like different people
come in different ways when they bring you here.
They keep us just up ahead here on the right
and then just straight ahead is where they led us
to get into the tower and then they took us out
to feed us to the dragons.
Okay, well, yeah, I guess we can take it from here.
You don't want to come back into the tower, do you?
Not particularly if I have the option.
Once you get out there,
find anyone that is obviously fighting against.
Look for a goblin that thinks she's a pirate.
Yeah, just say,
I'm with the Decimator of Dragons.
They're going to take care of you.
A singular decimator, they know who that is?
Yeah.
One of you?
Is that one of you?
The Decimators of Dragons.
Okay, just checking.
I just wanted to know if I needed a specific name after that
like once you know, maybe they ask you
for the secret handshake after that.
I didn't know.
Okay, yeah.
I mean, if there's a secret handshake,
we don't know what it is.
No, they didn't teach it to us.
Okay, well.
Sounds right.
Thank you.
Good luck.
Yeah, yeah, you too.
It's straight ahead there and he begins backing away
and heading back out the way that you had originally entered.
If he's fucking us over, you guys might be so mad.
I'm not fucking you over.
He says as he drifts off into the shadows.
Is he really a ghost?
I'm not fucking you over.
Merv's been dead the whole time.
Oh.
Who led you here?
Merv.
Oh, Merv?
We killed him first weeks ago.
I haven't heard that name in a long time.
Merv's been dead for 20 years.
Yeah.
All right, shall we head on down the path?
Let's go in the direction he pointed us.
You follow down and you pass
the same rooms that you had passed before.
There's the massacre of cultists
in their eating chambers.
Whoops, who did that?
As you get to the T-intersection,
there is a burnt up horde of zombies that you see
all lying and ashen on the ground.
You continue straight ahead and you pass by two other chambers
that look like another prisoner's area
and to the left, more of a refined, perhaps cultist chamber.
Ah, so some common areas.
Yep.
Just hangout rooms, beanbag chairs everywhere.
Exactly.
Foosball table.
Yep.
Yep.
There is-
Bar bridges.
There is a long stretch, a long corridor
that you follow with no other turns
and it ends with a door in the ceiling,
a stepladder up to it.
You want more rock, paper, scissors to see
who pokes their head up through this death trap?
I'll do it.
God love ya.
After you find, sir.
Gonna scamper on up that ladder.
Tell me what you do once you get to the top of the ladder.
I give the door a cursory little push
to see if I can move it without being too forceful with it.
There is a very heavy wooden door
with steel framework around it.
It takes a good amount of strength to push it up
but you crack it open and a beam of light shines through.
Am I blind?
Blinded, blinded.
Does it sound like a diamond?
Is Rihanna up there?
Oh, all right.
All you can see from just a cursory glance through
while trying to not shake or move too quickly
is a lot of the chromatic light that you saw through the window.
Okay, I'm gonna try to kind of lift it slowly up
and prevent it from like slamming on the floor as it opens.
You raise the door and the more it opens
you are able to see standing in front of you
with their back to you, a wizard in red robes.
Yeah, so I would really like to keep this door
from slamming open as I open it.
Roll a stealth check.
I would love to.
Just one wizard, did you say, Russ?
That's all he sees in front of him, yes.
A 31, is that good?
How do you, what?
According to my roll 20 sheet,
my stealth has 14 bonus to it.
I'm just telling you what's on my sheet.
I mean, I believe it.
I mean, I am proficient.
Yeah, that'd give you a boost.
That's good.
Yeah, I mean, that seems excessive,
but I mean, you're a high character.
I mean, yeah, I got a 17 plus this 14
that's listed on the sheet.
Yeah, you probably, yeah, you got it, that's it.
I mean, I'm just telling you what's on there, Russ.
Yeah, you quite handily managed to slowly open the door fully.
Nary a peep.
So there is no sound.
You're moving in silent as shadows right now.
Can I continue this stealthiness
into destroying this wizard?
You can certainly take an action.
That would spur on initiative order, though,
with your friends down at the bottom just saying.
Yeah, are you going to tell us there's a wizard?
Yeah, I give them the old like hand wave up,
but also a shh.
I mean, it gets the point across, right?
Sure does.
Who's going up and in what order?
I can go last.
Okay, so Nulara is going up first.
So when do you make your attack there, Flynn?
I'm going to wait right as Nulara is kind of getting
to the top of the ladder.
So that way she'll be able to like scamper up
and have a turn when it's time.
Okay, as you kind of look out beyond the wizard
and beyond the spire that you are in,
your eyes have a chance to adjust to this chaos
that is Tiamat's temple.
And you see that its interior is a single cathedral
like space that towers far overhead.
You look up and you see the platform above you.
You look out and you see it just rises as high
as you can imagine, though the overwhelming color
of this place is a lifeless ashen gray.
Each of the side vaults shimmers dimly blue,
green, red, and white or black.
The hues of the evil dragons
and their world consuming queen.
What color is the vault that we're in?
Black.
You see across the way red wizard standing
looking up as the one in front of you is
in each of the five vaults chanting
and channeling magical force into the central apps.
They're a kaleidoscope.
Whirl of arcane energy rises above the blackened floor,
stretching up into the twisting recesses
of the temple's central spire.
Yelora comes to the top of the chamber.
Um, yeah, I guess, um,
guess I'm going to take my shot.
Only live once.
Right?
Yolo.
Yolo.
Yolo.
All right, that is a 23.
Yes.
27 damage.
And I'm like, just going to aim straight for his neck.
You connect with the neck because he did not see this coming
and because of your precise hit.
His head falls to the ground.
Roll for initiative.
Yelora, you are up first.
So you are just coming through.
You see Flint behead a wizard in front of you.
The black energy that was coming from this spire
weakens but does not stop.
You see across the way, there is another wizard directly in front of you
and he sees this happen and he looks like he has stopped chanting
and is now preparing a spell towards you and your crew.
It is your turn.
How far away is he?
Easily 500 feet.
So too far for me to do anything with that guy, honestly.
Honestly.
And he, I guess, is the only one I can see though
because we are like back in our like vault area.
Yeah.
Cool.
Sorry if I was like better at circle math.
I could probably figure this out if he's 500 feet away across
but how close would like how bigger is each vault?
Approximately 100 feet.
Okay, so even the next closest guy to me would be 100 feet away.
If he's in the middle and I'm in the middle.
Yeah.
Exactly.
Okay.
Do you want to ready your action?
I mean, I can't even ready an action.
I got to make an action to get anywhere close to being able to like do a thing, right?
We have a bow and arrow.
Yeah, it doesn't go 500 feet, my dude.
Like even ranged weapons only go 120 feet.
I'm sorry.
The best ones only go that far.
No, no, no, it's really, really far.
How far does a longbow go?
My longbow goes 600 feet, man.
I passed you up my longbow.
I'm still on the bottom of the ladder.
Yeah, like I yeah, I mean I have ranged weapons but not that range.
That's that's crazy far.
But sorry, another question.
The energy in the center of the room is it like
a column of energy or a central glow?
Is it an eye of Sauron or is it a Marvel-style portal to another world?
It's like a tower of light.
So the chromatic colors are coming out from the spires.
Yeah.
Joining in the center and swirling up into the central apps.
Okay, I can dash as a bonus action because it's one of my feets.
Okay.
So I'm going to dash with my feets.
Using my feet, get it?
It's a it's upon you guys.
Yeah, I'm going to like run out.
I'll try to get to the entrance, I guess.
Yeah, you get to the entrance and it opens wide.
The spire to your right juts back and in so you can't see who's there.
You can see the guy preparing the spell looking at you across the way.
You can see another wizard to the right of him who is still doing his incantations
and also a big wide open spire to the left with the red chromatic energy.
You can see the wizard in there but still very well probably 200 feet away.
Okay, then I guess all I'm going to do is yell back to my friends.
The guy across the way is going to attack so get up here and then take cover.
It is Thea's turn.
Got it.
Got it.
Okay, I skittle up the ladder.
Yeah, you're up.
And I immediately take out from my pack.
Actually, I probably took it from my pack while I was down there because
that's a smart thing to do.
And then I skittled up the ladder with my Tome of Thunderstep.
I open it and I say,
and I immediately transport myself behind the dude.
I can transport myself instantly to an empty space I can see.
I can see behind the dude in front of me.
I transport behind there and that motherfucker takes 3d10 thunder damage.
But he gets to make a save.
A constitution saving throw.
But I mean, he'll still have to take half.
You know, wizards and their constitution.
Very, very high traditionally.
That's a good old six.
It's so close.
Okay, so he takes 20 thunder damage.
In the blink of an eye,
Thea runs up and she disappears and is immediately on the other side
of the wizard casting the spell.
Nularaaaia, you see this most directly.
Flint, you see her run up and kind of disappear.
And the wizard is propelled out, but he is not prone.
Yeah, he is.
Can casting spells make you horny?
I don't see why not.
I feel like it probably would, honestly.
Could that be like your battle bloodlust, right?
Thea's like fanning herself with her thunder tome.
Just like, pitch please.
This is great.
It is the wizard in the red spire's turn.
And he actually, now that you have a chance to look him over,
looks familiar to you.
With bald head and pasty white skin.
A staff with a glowing red gem on the end.
This wizard is adorned in red and gold armor.
This is a wizard you haven't seen
since you were aboard the frost giant's floating fortress.
This wizard is Wrath Modar.
He looks to you, Nulara, and you see his lips begin to move.
You can't hear him from a ways.
And he traces his free hand, a large sigil in the air.
Energy begins to glow around him and a globe extends out and surrounds him.
And he begins to step forward towards you.
Pussy.
Yay.
I obviously don't yell that as Thea, because I can't see him.
Yeah.
If you could see him though.
Oh boy.
Oh boy.
You hear from around you the chant of the ritual continuing
and you are reminded of the several red wizards in the room
preparing for Tiamat's arrival.
Flint, it is your turn.
I know you didn't tell us what the potions did that you gave us for us.
But I would like to drink Andrei's Gojuice right now.
Yes.
Yep.
Drinking a potion, is that an action?
It's usually bonus-y?
Yeah, I'd give you a bonus action.
Okay, good.
So I'm like, if I want to drink one, do I not get to do something?
With a name like Andrei's Gojuice, I gotta be moving quicker, right?
You'd hope so.
Less is an ironic name, and it cuts my movement in half?
Oh no.
Yeah, well.
Why would Arvid give this to you?
I mean, it seems like a bad idea.
This will help you when the world is just moving too fast and you need to slow down.
Just breathe it all in.
Take a minute.
So you drink this potion, and you feel a rush of strength course through your body.
You have just drank a spell of cloud giant strength.
I mean, I didn't think Gojuice would be strength-related, but alright.
Your strength score changes to 27 for one hour.
Whoa.
Oh my god.
Is there even a bonus level for that high?
There is.
Oh my god, there is, guys.
Welcome to the world of Gojuice.
Welcome to the middle part.
I'm your dungeon master, Russ More.
This means my lovely wife, Amy More.
We don't usually get to do this part together alone.
No we don't.
This feels like, I don't know, feels like weird.
Although the only thing I can think of is you said welcome to the middle part,
and all I can think about is the middle part is usually the best part of stuff.
Like donuts, like the filled donuts.
I'm just thinking about donuts.
By that tone, the middle part is the best part,
because we get to say thank you to all of our lovely people.
That's what I was thinking, exactly.
Thank you to you for listening to us.
Thank you to our patrons.
Thank you to the people who leave us reviews.
This is the part where we just love on everybody, and it's great.
Some place where there's going to be a whole lot of love,
and where we got invited to, and where we love that we got invited to,
was D&D Live 2019, The Descent.
It's a super creepy name.
We don't know anything about it.
Some details have started to leak to the people who are going to be there,
but we can't tell you.
I am not privy to those details yet, but it sounds creepy.
You got to get up on the Discord then, is what you got to do.
But that's going to be in LA, May 17th, 18th, and 19th,
and we're going to be there.
Schedule hasn't been released yet,
but if you go check out the website which has been linked in the description,
it gives you the full list of all the podcasts who are going to be there.
Tons of great folks who, just like us, are very excited to be there.
Rating and reviewing.
It may or may not help with charts.
We don't know.
We don't understand charts.
That's borderline math.
But when you say, when you look at a podcast in a podcast app,
and it's got like 50 five-star reviews or 100 five-star reviews,
and a whole bunch of people saying how much they love it.
Guys, it just looks good.
It looks good.
Makes people want to, I was going to say read it.
I know how podcasts work.
Makes people want to listen.
When I see something that's highly reviewed,
I think, well, you know what?
A hundred people can't be wrong.
Once you leave us a review, you know what?
We're going to read it right here.
Lee Henderson says, only found this podcast a week ago,
and I'm loving it.
The chemistry of the group is on point,
and the feeling that this is just a group of good mates
playing a home game shines through in a great and relatable way.
Thanks, Lee.
Oh, he also says, keep up the great work.
We will try.
We do our very best.
Thank you, Lee.
One from Apple Podcasts says, great podcast.
I've thoroughly enjoyed binge listening to every episode so far.
This pod will make you want to play D&D.
That's from Alejandro Khan from the United States.
So thank you, Alejandro and Lee.
Leave us a review, and we will find it,
and we will read it, and it will be fantastic.
We're going to be like the Liam Neeson of reviews.
I don't know where you are.
We have a special set of skills.
We can find reviews.
Search engines.
We can read them.
Links for everything that we've mentioned today,
you can find those in the description,
including our Dumbgeons and Dragons Discord,
where we have a whole bunch of lovely people
just talk about Dumbgeons and Dragons
and all the things that we've got going on in there.
And the Reckless Plague Guild Facebook group,
which is super active right now,
and it's got us and three other amazing podcasts,
The End of Time and Other Bothers,
The Dark Dice Podcast, and The Lucky Die Podcast.
I highly suggest you go check out all three of those as well.
If you're all caught up with us,
a final thanks to Sirenscape
for some of the amazing atmosphere.
Check them out at Sirenscape.com
to bring your games to life.
The next episode, it'll be out Wednesday, April 24th.
And as we have played the final episode in this arc,
we've done it.
We know when it is.
It's going to be May 1st.
So there are two episodes after today's episode
before we wrap up this arc in one way or another.
The end is nigh.
No spoilies.
No spoilies.
No spoilies.
You don't have to tell me no spoilies.
I can't remember what happened.
I'm just kidding.
We'll see how it goes.
Have a great week.
We'll talk soon.
You down this potion,
silver sliver of fingernail included,
and you...
Yeah.
Oh, it was good on the way down, though.
Everybody turns and looks at you,
and muscles are just rippling on top of muscles at this point.
His muscles have muscles.
Yeah.
So you now have the strength of a cloud giant, my friend.
Oh, my goodness.
Okay.
Now the one question.
What are you going to do with it?
That is the one question.
Okay.
How far is it to the front entrance of the vault?
60 feet.
So even though it took me like five feet to go kill this wizard?
Well, you came up like right behind him, so...
Okay, fair enough.
Yeah.
Okay, I'm gonna dash as far as I can,
which I mean my speed's only 25,
so I get almost there.
Yep.
I guess I'm gonna dash again.
Can you back to back dash?
Is that a thing that you can do?
I'd say you could probably do one more dash
because the theory is you're gaining extra movement,
so you're taking your movement plus your extra movement.
So if you want to dash again,
I'd give you another 25 feet or whatever you have.
Okay, so like a little bit further,
but not a full double again.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, I mean, I might as well.
Standing back in that cave
probably isn't going to accomplish too much at the moment.
So I'm going to get like 15 feet past New Laura this time?
Yeah, because you would move 75.
So yeah, are you going left or right?
Uh, I'll go to the right to see if I can see down that curvy backy path there.
So if you go out further into the center,
you would be able to clear the edge and see.
Otherwise, the wall is.
Yeah, that sounds good.
You're getting close to the edge of the swirling vortex of colors,
and you can see inside,
and this one is the green chromatic color.
And is this guy like super far away as well?
From your current location?
Yeah, he's going to be, you know, 150 to 200 feet.
Okay.
I guess I'll just like ready an attack if anyone comes near me.
Sounds good.
Because I mean, worst case scenario,
my turn comes back around and the readied action was wasted.
So as you reach the edge of this chaotic mess of magic,
a rush and an explosion of energy collides in the center,
drawing your attention to it for just a moment.
Uh, Russ, what color was the one that the, uh, snuck up on?
Blue.
Question, Russ, when he stopped doing his chanting,
did the blue energy die down at all or did it continue strong?
Uh, weakened.
Okay.
It's still continuing.
Same with the red as wrath kind of changed his his direction.
The only wizard that continues to do something
is the one that you knocked forward.
He stands up and begins to cast a spell at you.
Fancy trick you got there.
Thank you.
It's new.
He fires a cone of cold at you.
Blast of cold air begins to erupt from his hands
and you must make a constitution saving throw.
Okay.
Doesn't seem like it is okay.
Okay.
No, it is.
It's fine.
Fine.
Okay.
So I got a seven plus four is 11,
but I don't think it's going to be good enough.
So I am going to spend a luck point.
Okay.
And I am going to reroll my saving throw,
which is a 14 plus four is 18.
You see this cold beginning to form and come towards you.
Do you tell me what you do?
I do like some really like awesome backflip,
but where it's not like a tuck.
It's like the chest goes first.
And I'm like, and I'm like, I didn't even know I could do that.
It was amazing.
I yell like, guys, did you see my flip?
You do your backflip cold catching you as you flip backwards
and you land and you take half.
So three.
No, the full damage is 36.
So you're going to take 18 cold damage.
Well, that was really easy math because I was at 118.
So I can appreciate that.
He stands his ground towards you and we are back to the top of the round.
Remember when we got those diamonds from Xanthal's tower?
What the fuck did those do again?
They only let us go 30 feet.
I've been looking at them going like, can we?
Glad we're all on the same page.
I just got nothing.
I have a jumpy diamond on my character sheet.
I mean, I headed right, which now doesn't seem kind of stupid
because Flint has also gone right.
We'll say you kind of went more straight
because then you had kind of retconned
and said you just get to the entrance.
Rathmodar did walk out towards the middle.
So he's technically closer to you now.
He's moved 30 feet.
Yeah.
So he's still about 100-ish feet away, but he's getting closer.
Okay.
No, if he's a hundred feet away, I can actually do something.
I am going to cast a spell.
What?
I know it's crazy.
Do it.
I'm going to cast a hail of thorns.
It's a bonus action.
And then I am going to try to attack Rathmodar with my crossbow.
So that is a 17.
Yes, that hits.
Sweet.
Then when I hit him, a hail of thorns sprouts from my arrow.
So in addition to the normal attack, he has to make a deck save
and then he'll take more damage based on that.
You want me to do the normal damage first?
Does that make sense?
Sure.
That's an amazing four points of arrow damage.
Well, he drinks it up.
So the arrow comes through and strikes him in the shoulder.
Then what do you think happens?
Then he has to make a deck save.
I think his protective bubble probably just nullifies it.
No fucking bubble.
I forgot about the fucking bubble.
So as the arrow passes this shimmering globe
and springs to action 10 feet in front of him,
but is shattered and disperses as the arrow continues to go through and hit him in the shoulder.
So it's maybe like a little anti-magic shield.
Certainly seems to be that way.
Also, maybe the thorns are like on the shield now
and they're obstructing his vision and he has disadvantage on all his attacks.
Dispersed.
I said dispersed.
No, but I mean like maybe they're just on there.
Poofed.
Well, there's a fine dust so it's blurry.
Dare to dream.
He gets his magical windshield wipers out.
Okay, so I mean, I guess I may as well shoot him with another arrow.
Why not?
I mean, it's not doing much, but it's doing something.
But it's probably not doing nothing because that's a 13.
Yeah, 13 hits.
Okay, these wizards are usually kind of soft, right?
They wear a lot of robes, a lot of assless robes.
Similar to your assless chaps.
Interesting.
It's really just a hospital gown.
That is only another four damage.
And then I will try to, well not try to, I'll move closer.
Sure, so yeah, your first arrow goes, the spell disperses.
Second one grazes his arm.
Yeah, and Donnie, by the way, is just not doing anything
because he's too far away to do anything.
Makes sense.
Can he roll to like recharge his fire breath if he needs it?
Or does he automatically have it charged up?
He has to recharge it at the start of his turn, but then he has to use it.
And he only goes 50.
He can't like hang on to it?
I don't think so.
Yeah, you can hang on to it.
He could ready his action.
Well, yeah, you can recharge it and then it's just,
it is recharged for the next time you want to use it.
Oh, okay.
Well, great.
Let's try it.
Yeah.
Great.
He did that.
He's recharged.
His fire is better than no fire.
All right, he has recharged.
Okay, he's got that pilot light going all the time.
Now it is the hand guacamole's turn.
So I still have this douchebag in front of me, right?
Yeah, he's saying come get some.
He made me chilly.
I didn't like it.
So I'm going to cast Eldritch Blast on him.
Gonna be 27.
Gotta roll that three times.
Oh, right.
Okay, well, the first one gets four damage.
And then, oh.
What was that?
So close.
Okay.
Yeah, keep going.
I'll tell you what happens because of that.
And a 19.
Okay, so two of those hit.
It made me damage on two of those.
And then I will tell you what happens for the last time.
Amy totally just rolled the dice into her own crotch.
I thought there was no table there at all.
And an eight, so 12.
Two of your Eldritch Blasts hit him.
He is able to harness one and throw it back at you.
You take two forced damage.
This is cutthroat.
It is, it is.
I whisper, I'm gonna kill you.
Not if I kill you first.
It's kind of flirty.
We might make out here.
Yeah, it really is.
There's like a serious energy going on here.
It is.
It is Wrath's turn.
The energy in the center looks like it's gaining power
as Wrath begins to move closer to Nulara.
He continues to walk towards you, Nulara.
And he begins speaking in a low tone again.
And suddenly you see four of him walking towards you.
Classic mirror image.
How, out of curiosity Russ,
how far away from me is Wrath Modar now?
He's walking at just a casual pace.
He's not looking to...
He's walking serial killer style.
Oh yeah.
He's not in any rush.
So from Nulara, 40 feet from him.
And you would be now another 60 feet.
So you're probably about 100 feet from that action.
Okay.
The swirling vortex grows and explodes and shoots off energy
that gets sucked back in as the chanting of the ritual
resonates throughout the Temple of Tiamat.
And it is Flint's turn.
I'm going to dash towards Nulara there.
Okay.
So I'm going to move 50 feet that way.
Okay, you would make it...
About halfway.
Yeah, a little bit ahead of Nulara if you went the full distance.
Yep.
Okay, and I'm going to throw my Dwarven Thrower a couple times at Wrath.
Which one?
Well, all four of them and we'll find out.
But you have to aim at Wrath, right?
Yeah.
Well, I aim at him and then Russ determines what one it hits, if it hits any of them.
Oh.
Yeah.
All right.
First roll.
Yeah, it's like a 28, should be fine.
Your hammer flies forward striking the chest of one of the Wrath modars
and vanquishes it, turns to dust as your hammer zips back to your hand.
Second throw.
27.
Just as quickly you overhand throw your hammer again, striking another duplicate
that disperses into the air, the energy being sucked into the center of the room.
And as your hammer returns to your hand again, Flint, with a ringing thud, a voice
echoes among the resonating energy, sounding like it begins high up in
and echoing down and smashing itself upon you.
The voice says,
You are too late.
Our queen will rise.
Tiamat will destroy you soon.
Some of the music in today's episode is by Kavin McLeod of incompetech.filmmusic.io
and Scott Buckley at scottbuckley.com.au.
Sound effects can be found at boomlibrary.com and at sirenscape.com.
So Flint chopped his head off.
And then what happens?
Like what happens to the ritual?
Does like one of the colors come out of all the chromatic magic
that's happening in the middle or what?
Good question.
That's a great question.
It's a really good question.
I think.
I'm so glad Carla's on our team, guys.
Here's just what I'm thinking.
Would they be stupid enough to just have one wizard color?
No, they probably wouldn't.
They probably have backups just in case their wizards die.
Maybe.
I mean, I don't know why you're giving us ideas, but.
Yeah, really.
There's no ideas needed.
Don't you worry folks.
Yeah, I'm not worried.
I'm like, I'm pretty sure this part's all written down.
You go by the book, mister.
You owe us that.
I think we're going to be dead if Russ goes entirely by the book.
Yeah, probably.
Go a little bit easier than by the book, mister.
Just make it seem like we have a chance.
Sorry, I got to roll them each individually because it's quite important.
Well, it's not like you've rolled that same die like 13 times already.
Yeah, no problem.
Nobody's worried about it at all.
Who's counting?
I wish that.
Tommy's got tally marks going.
Cali marks.
I've just got them cali marks.
They're cali marks.
Cali marks, eh?
Okay.
All right.
Founded in California, 1762.
The cali mark.
The crow, the energy in the center gains power, gains clarity, is more powerful,
is looks like it's more clear, more powerful.
It looked like it used some conditioner in the shower this morning.
Maybe she's born with it.
Maybe it's Maybelline.
Maybe it is.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.